I remember the year when our family got their first Television Set. My grandmother bought one just after it became “the new thing” in South Africa. I was amazed!
Up until then my closest companions were books. My grandfather used to work for the press and brought me all the books that were rejected because of minor printing errors. The power of printed words that formed rich, beautiful colourful pictures in my mind became part of my daily life.
When I watched the first television show it felt as though my books had jumped up and become alive. I could not watch the presenters (and wow – they were all so beautiful!) without the urge to mimic them with lip movements and actions. The power to communicate with thousands of people with diverse backgrounds in different locations grasped the attention of every fibre of my being. Magic!
Passion from within echoed that I was born to communicate. Just like those television presenters (still broadcasting in black and white) who showcased the ability to look straight into the eye of the camera and deliver their message in a clear, fearless, shameless manner.
This struck a chord with a value I held dear and near – the power of expression. Expression was now not only through the medium of the written word but also, just as powerful (if not more) when acted out in real life.
Cheered by this discovery, I naturally took on a new form of expression. As a shy, nose-in-a-book little girl I gradually experienced immense courage to step onto the stage and perform in school dramas and ballet shows. Nothing in me had an urge to hold back. I looked the audience straight in the eye and expressed myself in a variety of creative ways. I spontaneously moved towards my value to express courageously.
And then I grew up. Growing up is hard. The magic faded into the background and I became more and more aware of critical, validating eyes in the audience of life. The power of authentic expression made way for the need for approval. A new value kicked in. This time it took form as avoidance. I ducked and dived to evade anything that looked like a stage. Even presenting an oral in front of my class made me feel a little bit feverish.
Very few of us realize how conflicting values can cause us to stay in the same space for years. Can you imagine being energized by the value of expression and simultaneously avoiding all situations that could result in being disapproved of or rejected?
Conflicting values will take you nowhere slowly. One of my clients discovered his conflicting values in business. He values success and works extremely hard just to the point where he might be confronted with uncertainty. Everything inside of him moves towards success and simultaneously away from uncertainty. Therefore he did not follow up on certain business deals. His business could not grow
to the next level until he faced the conflict in his values during a life coaching session.
Another client values honesty in relationships but moves away from situations where she might inflict pain on others. Lasting relationships can only be built on honesty, which includes moments of pain. This is how we get through them and grow closer to each other.
Conflicting values limitour ability to excel, grow and thrive.
Life Coaching invites individuals to invest time and money in the most valuable asset we have: LIFE.
Everybody can benefit from it. We all have conflicting values and this is only one of the aspects that restrict us from reaching our goals and living our dreams.
I learned from life coaching that the degree I can cope with my fear of rejection will also be the degree to which I will be successful in life.
I chose to re-think many of my values in order to serve my life mission. The values that work against it had to go…
Feel free to contact me for a Life Coaching session. It will enable you to unpack all the restricting aspects in your life. There is a full money-back guarantee on your first session should you not find it beneficial.
“Life is resolvable with the right conversations and designable with the right people”
New Insights Life Coaching Training